Sup, Blog

Heyyy blog. Whats up its your girl Georgia

Some of you are probably like "yay! shes back!"
Some of you might be like "Wait, she was gone?"
Others even might be like "wow. you made it a week."

Well, let me tell you. I am not back! Still no social media, except to promote my blog. In my week away though, I realized something really important.

Not every kid can sit down and have a conversation with the world, and furthermore,

Not every kid can sit down and have a conversation with the world about all of their vulnerabilities and weaknesses.

I was sitting in the library with my friend, Zack today (he is very good at not being on his phone while talking to other people) and we were kinda just tossing life experiences and dreams and current ambitions around. My blog got brought up, and he asked me what it was about and I explained to him that I kinda just talked about my struggles and triumphs. I told him that I use my life experiences to give others hope, like using your vulnerabilities as a strength. He gave me this look. It was kinda funny, not going to lie. Hes like "I've never heard anybody say that before"

My mom used to tell me she wanted to call me "shock and awe". I have no idea if (in this context) it was a good thing or not, but my little brain was like "wow that is the best thing to be, EVER"

I love shocking people. That's why I don't mind being underestimated, I think. Its also maybe why I love making dramatic changes to myself. I don't want to be boring. I want people to look at me and think "what is so different about her" Because we are all living the same life, but mine seems like so much of an adventure.

In this same conversation with Zack, I was talking about the adventures my brother and I used to have, and even the adventures I have alone. He seemed so intrigued in my stories. Who knew that walking down a dirt road with your brother in the middle of the night, could be such an adventure?

And then I was like, "or maybe its just my perspective"

Because I STRIVE to live my life with enthusiasm and passion and excitement and optimism. If its going to be dreadful, let it be dreadful once. Why waist days on dreading something? Yeah. I actually thought of that. Which is basically what my mom has been saying about anxiety. Whats the point? If its going to happen, it will happen. So let it happen once. Go through the stress and torture one time,  don't waist every day on it. BUT THEN LIKE. WHY WAIST ANY TIME ON IT WHEN YOU CAN JUST TURN ON MUSIC AND DANCE AROUND? Oh, the simple and stressless life of a young college student, right? Actually, its proven that exercising is actually beneficial to you in many different ways, including boosting your mood and reducing stress so HA I'm actually helping myself and not just wasting time dancing. You should try it some time ;)

Right now, on Tuesday mornings,I am waking up at 6, doing my morning routine, and then leaving the house by 7:30 to go volunteer at a thing my church does. We have this huge kitchen in the basement, and every Tuesday morning, we prepare a lavish breakfast of something different every week, and serve it for free to anyone who walks in the door. Today, we had chicken and ham and biscuits and gravy and eggs and a really good vegetable soup, with pastries. The guys like to tease me about Billy, and the smile I always have on my face when I walk in the door.

But I love it. I love being teased (in good nature), I love waking up early, I love making other people happy. Someday I want to be able to repay everyone who has ever helped me out. It will be completely anonymous, but I want to shower my people with goodness. I have been given so much support and love from the people around me, and I have such a strong desire to give back.

That is where I think I get my true glow. Because I live my life with such a deep, passionate gratitude. To my parents, who continuously go so completely out of their way to help me out. To my mom who listens to me, every time I call crying over anything, even if she is in the middle of her work.

To my dad who drives 5 hours, doesn't get sleep, fixes my car after hours of inconvenience, and then drives another 5 hours home so he can still not get sleep, but go back to work.

To each individual in my personal little community up here in Spokane that shows me unconditional love that I have yet to fully understand.

To the people in Wallowa county who not only got me here, but continue to keep me motivated.

Not every kid gets to sit down and have a conversation like this. Not every kid has the power that I do, in that I am completely able to express myself through writing on a world wide stage, and maybe. Possibly, if I'm really lucky, make a positive impact on their life.

I currently have over 6,500 views on my blog. I appreciate every single one of them, and I would love that number to grow. I am not sure I really contribute much to your daily lives, but each of you contribute to mine and for that, I am extremely grateful. I am not back on facebook, you still cant DM me over Instagram, my snapchat hasn't been logged into in over a week, and it will continue to be like that because I am enjoying being able to freely explore my mind without my addiction pulling me away from my thoughts <3

This blog was going to be a lot more casual and less random than it is but legit thats what was coming to my brain as I typed and I never edit my blogs so at least you know you're getting the raw and real version of Georgia!