Chile

Hola!!!

I sill don't know ANY Spanish and we have one translator!!

That being said, welcome to my most recent Chile update.

I can't believe how fast this six months has gone. I haven't even noticed it passing. Hello. I leave in like three weeks. We had out first meeting about Chile last week. There are 8 people going from my team, and 8 people on the team that Chile is sending to go with us. Thats 16 people total, and only one of us can speak both languages, so this is going to be fun!! I am actually really excited. My pastor told us that this is the smallest team that Chile has ever sent to go with us, and I am really really excited. I know that was God. I was worried about meeting so many new people, and not being able to connect with all of them. I feel like I will be able to learn more, even though its a smaller group. More about each person individually, more about their walk with Christ, and more about their culture. Smaller groups are more intimate.

I am also really excited because the translator is an English teacher. As most of you know, I am currently at a cross road with what exactly I would like to make my career, and I am teaching rn (in an after school program) and LOVING it. I haven't even left for the mission and I can already feel God working on me, through this mission. The language barrier is going to be difficult, but I am really excited to learn how to over come that and experience a culture that is completely different from mine.

I will be on a little island called Quehui ("Kay-Wee). I will have no cell service, there will be one bathroom for six girls to share, and i will have to wash all my clothes by hand. we will be sleeping on the floor of the church, and other than that, we really don't know what we will be doing, which I think is SO. HECKIN. COOL. I'm not very good at being spontaneous. I am, sorta, when I get to plan my spontaneity. Or when I know where I am going or what I am doing, but I also really love having schedules, they don't even keep time! The leader of the Chilean team will say "ok lets go" and we might not know where we are going, or what we are doing, but we just grab our stuff and go!!!

I am nervous because we will be doing some door to door evangelism. I need to have a devotion, and a testimony ready to go, and I honestly have no idea what to say. I feel like my journey to God was an emotional roller coaster full of little moments that kinda kicked me into God's grace, but I never really had like, one HUGE moment where I was like "Ok, I can't do this without God and I want to choose Him and let Him be the leader of my life." I kinda grew up with God in my home. My mom got us little picture bibles and she talked about Jesus and we went to VBS and church sometimes. So I always knew that God was real.

I guess thats my main struggle. I feel like my testimony wont really be enough. I almost feel like Moses. He had a speaking impairment and God still chose him to be the speaker, which I guess should make me fell better, but I just don't feel like my story is even going to change anything for anyone. I didn't come out of drugs or lust or a criminal record. I'm just little me that went through some hard stuff but nothing really horrible. My mom and I were watching Bridget Jones one day, and she got caught in this Mexican prison or whatever for drug smuggling (which wasn't her fault) and she started talking about how her boyfriend was so horrible, and the girls around her started telling her how their boyfriends beat them and stole their money and sold them into sex slavery, and all of a sudden, Mr. Darcy didn't seem that bad. So I kinda feel like Bridget in that sense, too. Like, yep. I had some struggles, but nothing THAT bad.

When I am asked about what I am most excited for about this mission, I always  say that A) I am so heckin excited to kinda rough it and follow where the Lord leads for two weeks and B) I know this mission will change me probably more than I change anything else. Maybe God will help me see value in my shabby story of coming to him. Maybe God will help me see real value in myself. I want to build relationships with the people around me.  I really hope God works on me. I am completely open to being molded. I am headed into probably the biggest change of my life so far (getting married) and I want God to help me become who He has planned for me to be.

God has a plan, I know that. He chose me to be a part of that, which I've been trying to understand since I saw it on the bus window. I will be journaling every day so that when I come home, I can either A) make a little series of all of my journal entries, or B) make one big post about my mission (also so my mom can read it. It feels weird knowing I wont get to share any of this with her until I get home) There will be more blogs to come, I hope you stay tuned!! I love you guys, thank you for your support!!