So how the heck do we keep things interesting? Well, we live each day with the goal in mind to make it an adventure to tell each other about. Meaning, if all I do is wash the dishes and clean my car, then you bet it was the most amazing car wash session I have ever had and my interior SPARKLES like Mr. Clean HIMSELF was the one who did it. If all he did was study, then you bet he learned some good stuff he cant tell me because its classified, but!! It was insanely interesting and he's really excited for his next sim (BTW, hes been crushing it. His instructors are even impressed with him. Me? I'm not surprised. Just insanely proud)
But Georgia, isn't it boring to just talk on the phone? Yeah. It really is. Luckily, that is not all we do. Oh no, we shake things up!
First, we read the bible together every night. This time, it was his turn to pick the book, so we are in Samuel. We do like, a little bible study. He catches things I have never heard, and to make things even more interesting, we even ask my mom what she thinks its saying. I personally love this time with him. I love listening to him read the Bible to me. I really love him talking to me about what he thinks, and noticing little things I don't notice.
We also play video games. I can't believe that I am actually admitting this. Yes, Billy Wisor is trying to teach me to play a video game. I can not remember the name of it, but he video calls me and then we are on the same team and its basically capture the flag, and he has to coach me through all of it because I don't know anything about video games. Bless his soul, I ask so many questions it probably annoys him haha
We also video call to watch movies. that way, we can see each other while we watch a movie on our laptops, and we can talk and see each others reactions and stuff. I really enjoy it. We switch who picks the movies. He likes watching Guardians of the Galaxy (which I don't mind. HEllo Chris Pratt), I educate him on Disney musicals. Our next movie will be "10 Things I Hate About You", which I found out he also liked the other night!!! I was very excited. I love that movie!!!
We also like to face time to do random things, like a skincare routine, or I teach him a new little dance, or just how to dance. The other day, we were video calling just to video call, and we both fell asleep. Its just nice to be around each other. My mom thinks our conversations are just that boring. (kidding. She was kidding)
Its hard. I mean, there are tons of moments when we just laugh and giggle and we are totally goofy, but there are also moments when my heart hurts because I wish I could rest my head on his shoulder, or something happened in the day and one of us just needs a hug, and the best we can do is say that we're right there, and stay on the phone until its more okay. I struggle, because I want to make him feel loved and supported and taken care of, but there is only so much I can do from across the country.
This relationship has changed a lot in the past few months, but our relationship changes all the time. I move different places, work different hours. School adds more stress to him. He leaves for training for a week and we can't talk. I leave for two weeks on a mission and we can't talk. New issues pop up, internet goes down, phones stop working or wont charge. Its never a guarantee that I will be able to talk to him in a day.
I get to plan a wedding with him 3000 miles away, and a lot goes into that that I didn't even know. Like, the details on an invite? I completely forgot about that. Not to mention, we are young. We will both be half way through our 21st year of life when we get married (well, he will almost be 22) if things even go the way we want them to, but we don't know yet because we are waiting on the military. Do I just want to elope and start my life? Uhm, heck yes. Will I? No. Our future is worth more than that. The waiting, is killing me. The distance is driving me crazy. I'm across the country from my best friend, with nothing but a phone to keep us connected and it honestly sucks.
I would not do this if it was not worth it, and believe me, its worth it. Every hello, proves it. Every time his hand brushes mine and I remember that hes finally RIGHT THERE. Its everything. I put on a smile, every day. I get my work done, and I live my life like its an adventure to share with the one I love. I pray to God He opens an opportunity for me to go see Billy. I do what I can to distract myself from the fact that hes not here, but this sucks.
Every time he kisses me goodbye, I have no idea when I get to see him again. We have no idea how long this engagement will last because we don't know when he deploys. I miss him. I cry when hes not listening, I do my best to laugh when hes around, but I know in my heart that at the end of the day, no matter how long this day is, he will be there. He will be there to tell me he loves me and that hes going to be with me again soon. So I will wait. I will have a military date night, I will wait every day until he calls, and I will love him with all I've got, from 3000 miles away.
I know that its hard to understand. Why would anybody do that? Why would anybody choose that for themselves? And even if you know why, its still hard to understand what it feels like, or why its so hard. I joke about having the house to myself for six months every once in a while, I know I joke about. Everything, but I don't know how else to be okay when I wake up every day, missing my best friend.
So. Today, I will put on my makeup, I will dress cute, and I will hand you your morning coffee out the window. I will smile while I do my tasks, and I will answer with "we aren't sure yet" when you ask me about wedding details. I will laugh and tell you its okay and that we are rocking it when you tell me that it must suck, and I'll have another military date night. One less day until I see him again, I just don't know how many more are ahead of me.
No comments:
Post a Comment
I would love a comment from you guys! It always brightens my day to hear from my readers <3